happy trails

Yep, that's me in the white dress. And the tall one next to me, that's my husband. We walked down the aisle to Journey after we said our I do's. It was overwhelming and incredible and we're both pretty much walking on air these days.

So, anyway: Changes. I'm retiring this blog. It'll stay up, but no new posts from this one.

...

While I was writing about some awesome champagne poached pears I made last Sunday, I realized that it was time for something new. Though I loved every single thing about those sweet little pears, it felt too heavy to write about the ingredients, and it felt too heavy to write about the process, and for whatever reason...in that moment I was returned to a very unhappy place -- so, that's it! Time to move on.

Thanks for reading all of my cheese-and-butter-laden recipes. Not sure if I'll take up again soon, but if I do, you'll know it.

Thanks for everything, & cheers.

M

souk

Souk
1208 H Street Northeast

Washington, DC 20002
(202) 658-4224

We popped into Souk last night after finding out the wait at Sticky Rice would be prohibitive to our growling bellies...It's Moroccan tapas. Or, I should say "Moroccan" "tapas." Having had the distinct pleasure of visiting Morocco at the ripe age of 19 to visit my brother for 3 days, I now consider myself an expert on all things Moroccan.

No, not really. I'm not sure what was Moroccan about Souk aside from maybe the pillows. It seemed more like Lebanese fare to me -- kibbeh, kafta, baba gannouj, and the like. We ordered five tapas - large portions for being called small plates. Each of them more average than the last.

It's a good deal at Souk (bill was $35, no drinks), but it's not much else. The kibbeh were too bready, too hamburgery. The kafta was dry and ill-seasoned. The seasoned feta needed the most editing -- a crumbly mess of dry feta and zaatar was not only near flavorless, but baffling. (As a foil, the "crazy feta" which is more or less the same thing at Cava Mezze on 8th street is divine). Second worst was the baba gannouj -- all. wrong. Raw-ish eggplant threads in a milky mixture. No sign of tahini. No sign of roasted eggplant.

SO if you're on H Street -- skip Souk, there's no magic there. Wait it out at Sticky Rice, drop into Taylor Deli for a sandwich, or belly up to the bar at Granville Moore's. Souk...well, Souk sucked. If you like Lebanese mezze, try Neyla in Georgetown or try Cava Mezze on 8th Street.

Grade: D (Won't recommend, won't go back, didn't get food poisoning or go broke eating there).

chesapeake room

After much anticipation, a new sister restaurant to our favorite Lola's and Molly Malone's opened up on Barracks Row. We waited months to try out the Chesapeake Room, lured by wingback chairs on a large patio and promises of summertime Chesapeake Bay fare. After trying it out for dinner last night -- all I can say is: Hm.

It wasn't BAD...but it wasn't...how to say, worth the $90? To start, after seeing several tables open on the patio when we walked up -- we were told we'd have a 30-45 minute wait. Not a huge deal, but sort of confusing. To continue on that theme, the menu is baffling. Straight up weird. Fried oysters AND wild boar bolognese with pappardelle AND sea food salad and...a bison burger? It's completely strange. ...But it all looks good.

Our waiter recommended the roast chicken and the pork chop, the latter which we've heard rave reviews about but opted out of last night. I ended up splitting some fried oysters with Mr. Tank, while I enjoyed a disappointingly watery cocktail called "Like The Chef" which is lemonade and sweet tea vodka. He ordered the roast chicken breast (which, frankly, looked more like roast breast of game hen), and I had a salad. My salad was great -- but again, puzzling: greens, fennel, duck confit, smoked chicken?, haricot verts, tomatoes, and dried cherries.

All of this is not to deter you, my six readers, from trying out this patio next time you're on Barracks Row. I recommend going late, for drinks on the patio -- and don't miss the fried oysters, they were really delicious. But don't expect to find any crab cakes. Why would they serve crab cakes at a place called the Chesapeake Room, anyway?

High points: Cocktail menu, patio
Low points: Strange food menu, odd decor indoors (think: sailboat meets Red Lobster)

I'll go again, but probably not for dinner. The cost of mediocrity is disappointment, after all.

Grade: C- (Food is only ok, pricey. Go for the oysters and the outdoors and that's it.)

Ted's Bulletin

Ted's Bulletin, a retro diner-esque eatery, opened last week on Barracks Row on Capitol Hill. This place seemed to appear out of nowhere - but after yesterday's lunch, I can safely say this one will be around for a while. Walking in Ted's is like walking into someplace your grandparents may have enjoyed. They have salvaged some of the original decor from Philadelphia's Civic Center to decorate this place - which is just...the most delightful departure from the tired martini decor that seems to invade most new restaurants these days. They serve shakes AND alcohol AND pastries in the bar/waiting area. There's even a walk-up pastry counter on 8th Street. Each pastry is hand crafted, including such delights as snickerdoodle cookies, chocolate chip scones, croissants, and even homemade strawberry pop-tarts. So, save room for dessert.

The menu is divided into salads, sandwiches, supper, and sides. Yes, supper. There you will find such hearty fare as herb roasted chicken, meatloaf, country fried steak, four cheese lasagna, and ribs. I will be back until I can try all of their entrees (priced reasonably from $14-24). However, I chose something from their sandwiches menu: I couldn't resist the grilled cheese and tomato soup ($9). The salty bread was grilled perfectly with a creamy layer of good old American cheese in the middle. The tomato soup was seasoned just right - tangy, just the right amount of salt, and very slightly herbal.

Now, Ted's isn't without its faults. For instance, I had been drooling over their hand-cut french fries speckled with sea salt since I caught a glimpse of them when we went in. Imagine my disappointment when they ran out of these fries, and instead served me a plate of wan ore-ida shoestrings. We also ordered a side of macaroni and cheese with andouille -- and not a trace of andouille in the thing. I'll chalk it up to the newness of things, and let it be at that.

Other reviews I've read on Ted's tout their milkshakes as among the best they've had. I may try one out on my next visit, if only for the novelty of eating ice cream out of a soda glass. Ted's opens early (7 a.m.) and closes late. You can get breakfast all day. If you're looking for a good, solid place to eat -- try Ted's. I promise you won't be disappointed -- this place is for real, and real good.

cobb salad

Sometimes, the stars align...and magic happens. The other night, I happened to have 80% of the ingredients for cobb salad...with a quick stop to Eastern Market for chicken and avocado, I was all set to make magic happen. (And--oh yes, there's bacon in this salad, it's under the chicken.) Now, anyone can make a cobb salad. The instructions here are how to make the best cobb salad (with very crisp bacon, perfectly cooked egg, and tender chicken). With just a few simple tricks this salad is transformed from a bar menu snore to a weeknight victory.

Cobb salad
Serves: 2
Prep time/cook time: 40 minutes

You'll need:

• 2 heads of baby romaine lettuce
• 2-3 oz. blue cheese, crumbled
• 4 slices bacon
• 2 chicken breasts
• 2 eggs
• 1 very ripe avocado
• 12 cherry tomatoes, halved
• 1/4 C. dressing of your choice
• Olive oil
• Salt & Pepper

First, preheat your oven to 375. Lay your chicken breasts on a foil lined baking sheet, brush your chicken breasts with olive oil, and season both sides of the chicken liberally with salt and pepper. Roast, uncovered for 40-45 minutes, depending on how big your ...um....breasts...are...

Next, wash and dry your romaine leaves. Chop the romaine (I like mine in 1/4" ribbons). Portion the romaine out into two big salad bowls or plates, and place those plates with the lettuce in the refrigerator until you're ready to assemble your salad.

For perfect hard-boiled eggs -- place two cold eggs in a small pot, fill with cold water, cover, and bring pot to a boil. As soon as the water boils, remove the pot from the heat, and set a timer for 9 minutes. After the 9 minutes are up, rinse the eggs in cold water, peel, and slice.

Bacon can be tricky and messy. Here's a trick for perfect bacon every time: Lay bacon in a single layer on a foil-lined baking sheet. Bake for 10-12 minutes, until bacon is looking like it's almost ready. Then, take the bacon out of the oven, place on a plate lined with paper towels, and microwave for 1 minute. Voila - extra crisp bacon, extra easy. For this salad, chop your bacon once it's crispy.

After 40-45 minutes, check on your chicken. Remove it from the oven, and place a foil tent over the pan for 10 minutes. The chicken will continue to cook, but this also allows the juices to re-distribute within the meat, so you won't end up with dried-up chicken bits on your salad.

When you are ready to assemble, remove your greens from the fridge. Dress them to your liking. In rows, place the tomatoes, then the egg, then the blue cheese, then the bacon. Dice your chicken and place that in another 'row' on top of your greens. Finally, just before you are ready to serve -- cut an avocado in half, score it into cubes with a knife, and scoop out 1/2 avocado on top of each salad (season with salt and pepper if you wish).

Enjoy!

carboloading

First, an apology about the photography on this site. I'm using my iPhone. Enough said. Still, I hope the photos don't discourage you from the recipes, which -- scout's honor -- are solid! Here's a recipe for spaghetti carbonara. This is the exact recipe I learned in Rome (well, almost -- that recipe included peas, which I didn't have last night). Here you go!

Spaghetti Carbonara
Serves: 2.5
Prep time: 10 minutes
Cook time: 10 minutes

You'll need:

• 1/2 lb. spaghetti
• 4 egg yolks
• 1 C. fresh grated parmesan cheese
• 5 strips bacon
• 1/2 C. pasta water
• 1/2 T. black pepper

First, preheat your oven to 375. Bring a large pot of water to boil, and salt it generously. Place 5 strips of bacon on a lined baking sheet for 10-12 minutes until bacon is crispy. When bacon is done, drain it well and chop it.

When water is boiling, cook pasta according to package directions.

Meanwhile, separate 4 eggs -- place the yolks in a large bowl. Next, grate 1 C. parmesan cheese over the egg yolks. Add 1/2 T. black pepper. Whisk well. This will be a pretty sticky mixture.

When the pasta is done, turn off the heat. Don't drain the pasta water -- use 1/2 C. and slowly (slowly) trickle this 1/2 C. into the egg mixture while whisking rapidly. You don't want scrambled egg pasta, so this is a very important step. When the eggs/cheese have been tempered, use a tongs to transfer the pasta from the pot to the egg mixture. Mix well, taste, and adjust seasonings to your liking. This is also the part where you would add 1 C. frozen peas if you felt like keeping with the tradition.

To serve, pile up a big mound in a bowl and top with more parmesan and chopped bacon. You will marvel how five ingredients (two of which are breakfast items) can become such a decadent, flavorful, satisfying dinner! Enjoy.

old school, new school

The old new school: Julia Child chefing on the set of "The French Chef"

The new new school: Canadienne Laura Calder posing with some vegetables.

The Food Network has done a lot for the home chef, there's no denying that. From tent-clad Ina Garten to "chi-potol-ay" slinging Bobby Flay -- there are many loyal followers of their personalities. Like all good things, the Food Network is growing up, and it's growing out of its old, easy ways -- enter the Cooking Channel, the newer, more honest, more hand-wrought spin-off of the Food Network.

What am I talking about? Gone will be the days of packet-opening, corner-cutting chefing. The focus now will be on the basic question that has permeated food discussions for the last ten years: where does our food come from? Peppered in, too, are new, more authentic instructional cooking shows -- no more Italian Americans cooking Italian food -- Cooking Channel is giving us a REAL Indian cooking real Indian food, a real Canadian cooking French food! ...Wait, what?

Nobody has dared touch French Cooking since our darling Julia Child entered the American kitchen with her show, "The French Chef." Sure, Ina Garten will walk us through a sole mariniere, or an apple tart tatin (and surely her methods are no less authentic!), but we've been missing the French Chef in our TV diets. No more, thanks to the Food Channel's daring choice of Laura Calder - a trained journalist whose focus shifted to food. She'll be gracing our living rooms with "French Food at Home" -- a nice homage to our friend Julia, who wanted nothing more than the average American to enjoy the pleasures of French cooking in the comfort of their homes.

The cooking Channel will debut on May 31, but Ms. Calder's show has aired for years in Canada, making for plenty available YouTube clips! On the Cooking Channel - will she endear us all by flipping an omelet directly onto her hot plate? Or will she disappoint with uninspired standbys? Can't wait to find out.

More reading:
Newcomer to Food Television Tries for a Little Grit (NYT)

10 things that are always in my pantry

1) Black pepper. Don't underestimate the power of this spice!
Favorite dish featuring black pepper: spaghetti cacio e pepe

2) Whole wheat penne pasta.
Favorite penne pasta recipe: penne arrabiata.
3) Which brings me to my third ingredient of choice -- pepper flakes. I put pepper flakes on pasta (any pasta), on soup (in any soup), on pizza, thai takeout...pretty much everything except my oatmeal.
4) A block of Parmesan cheese is always in my refrigerator.
Favorite thing to do with parmesan: on top of lemon pasta. See #5.

5) Lemons. Always in my fridge. Great to make chicken piccata, lemon pasta, or put in your water if you wanna.
Favorite lemon recipe: Lemon Spaghetti.
6) Olive oil. Extra virgin. Everybody should have this in their kitchen. My favorite thing to do with olive oil is to drizzle it over charred bread, after it's been rubbed with a clove of garlic. Sprinkle with salt and you have REAL garlic bread.
7) Crushed tomatoes. Perfect in arrabiatta sauce (mentioned above)...or for a hundred other things. Try this out next time you're making simple spaghetti: Pour can of crushed tomatoes in a sauce pot. Cut an onion in half, remove peel. Drop onion halves in crushed tomatoes. Add 1/2 t. salt. Simmer for 30 minutes, longer is better (lid on!). Just before serving, remove onion from sauce, discard (or eat!), and stir in 4 T. butter to tomatoes. Toss with hot spaghetti, and be prepared for about a million compliments.

8) Canned albacore tuna in water. Great on salad, or mixed in with some roasted tomatoes for a quick puttanesca sauce. Not a gourmand item, no, but cheap, easily available, and good for a million different things. Try sauteeing it with a couple cloves of garlic in 1 T. olive oil. Add some tomatoes, cover, let the tomatoes burst. Add some red pepper flakes, capers, and toss with pasta -- easy!

9) Bread crumbs. Try this: Pour 2 T. olive oil in a skillet over low heat. Pour in 3/4 C. bread crumbs, stir 'til oil is absorbed. Watch carefully as they brown, remove when fragrant and toasted. Grind black pepper into the crumbs. Toss with hot spaghetti and top with parmesan -- enjoy some carb on carb crime.

10) Good French sea salt. You need it. For everything.

tortellini soup

It's going to be raining in Washington, D.C. for the next six days. I've had a cold for the past seven. This whole thing is really not looking up for me -- but I tell you what I just did over my lunch hour: I made really awesome tortellini soup. That's right, in 1 hour, I went to the store, got the ingredients (all five), went home, and in a half an hour, I was enjoying a piping hot bowl of soup. Now I feel invincible. Try it:

Tortellini Soup
Serves: 6
Prep time: 10 mins
Cook time: 10 mins

You'll need:

• 1 package cheese tortellini (I used about half of a "family sized" Buitoni package)
• 1 box organic chicken stock
• 1 28 oz. can chopped tomatoes
• 8 oz. baby spinach (pre-washed if possible)
• 1 onion, chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, chopped
• 1 T. olive oil for sauteeing

Optional:
-Red pepper flakes, salt for seasoning
-Parmesan for sprinkling on top
-Basil for sprinkling on top

Easy easy directions:
Chop the onion, chop the garlic. Heat 1 T. olive oil over medium heat, sautee until soft, about 8 minutes. Add the chicken stock, and the tomatoes (with juices). Let them come to a simmer. Add spinach, and finally, add the tortellini. Simmer for 8 minutes with lid half-on, add water to pot if too thick. Check seasonings, adjust, and serve.

urb garden

Another new adventure! I planted some herbs in my kitchen. I had a west-facing window. I got some pots and some dirt and some seeds from the hardware store. I planted them, watered them every day, and three weeks later, here they are! From left to right, you'll see: cilantro, rosemary, thyme, and basil (purple and large-leaf Italian). Taking a page out of Nonnie's book, again, I'm hoping to have a healthy harvest all summer long from my herban urb garden.

health/food

Not hugely creative, here, but I had to share my latest favorite lunch. Tuna & white bean salad, inspired by standby Senate-side eatery Neb's.

Despite my budding future plans to open a pommes frites shop in DC, I have a distinct fear of mayonnaise. Most tuna salad uses mayonnaise. Therefore, I don't eat much tuna salad. Neb's is different, they don't. This is a great salad that is packed with protein and fiber, and it definitely won't break the bank. Hope you enjoy!

Tuna & White Bean Salad
Servings: 1

For tuna salad:

• 1 can white albacore tuna in water
• 1/4 C. white beans, drained (cannellini)
• 1 t. capers
• 1 t. mustard
• 1 t. balsamic vinegar
• Greens (3-4 oz.)
• Tomatoes
• Other toppings as you like (i.e. bell peppers, kalamata olives, tomatoes)

Dressing:

• 1 T. olive oil
• 1 t. balsamic vinegar
• Salt & Pepper

In a bowl, combine tuna, cannellini beans, capers, mustard, balsamic vinegar. Mix well until combined. Dress greens with olive oil, vinegar, salt and pepper, top with tuna, add other toppings as you like. I eat this salad with a few stoned-wheat crackers - tuna & white beans make a great topping for those, too! Enjoy.

Spreading the Gospel of Pioneer Woman

I first learned about Pioneer Woman through my friend Hilary who can do it all: blog, chef, plus hold down a sweet life in NYC. So began my love affair with PW. I came for the carbonara, I stayed for the love story. I've been hooked ever since. Last weekend I attended a ladies-only brunch affair (read: mimosas, mimosas, mimosas, maybe a bar crawl). I brought Pioneer Woman's French Breakfast Puffs (mostly because they looked like the most feasible thing to make without a stand mixer, which I don't own. Yet.) So, In an ode to PW, here's her recipe, with some sad, low-res iPhoto photos:

First, you have to measure the flour, baking powder, nutmeg, and salt. Mix 'em up. That was a boring picture. Then you have to mix together (shudder) Crisco and sugar. That was an unappetizing picture. Then you have to cream them together while gradually adding milk, which is what I was doing here.

And then add some more flour, stir until your arm gets tired/batter is smooth.

This seemed to match the photo in PW's coobook, so I called it quits. At this point in real life behind the lens, Bram was annoyed I wasn't paying any attention to him, so he popped into the kitchen wearing an outfit that matched mine. Nobody tell him he's not funny.

Then I measured everything into mini muffin tins. The real recipe says to use regular sized muffin cups but I really don't like big muffins so I put the kibosh on that one. The next few parts are the best:

Bake for 18-20 minutes in a 350 oven. The nutmeg smells amazing at this point.

Then, while they're still warm, dunk them into a vat of melted butter. After that, roll them around in a vat of cinnamon sugar. It was a messy job, but someone had to do it.

In conclusion, these were pretty good if you like butter and cinnamon sugar and muffins, which apparently all women like as I learned at the ladies'-only brunch.

Here's the real recipe with better photos and fewer stories about Bram:
http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2007/12/french_breakfast_puffs/

Prep time: 30 minutes Cook time: 25 minutes Difficulty: Easy Servings: 12

Ingredients

• 3 cups Flour
• 3 teaspoons Baking Powder
• 1 teaspoon Salt
• ½ teaspoons Ground Nutmeg
• 1 cup Sugar
• ⅔ cups Shortening (Crisco)
• 2 whole Eggs
• 1 cup Milk
• 1-½ cup Sugar
• 3 teaspoons Cinnamon
• 2 sticks Butter

Preparation Instructions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease 12 muffin cups.

In a large bowl stir together flour, baking powder, salt, and nutmeg. Set aside.

In a different bowl, cream together 1 cup sugar and shortening. Then add eggs and mix again. Add flour mixture and milk alternately to creamed mixture, beating well after each addition.

Fill prepared muffin cups 2/3 full. Bake at 350 degrees for 20-25 minutes or until golden.

In a bowl, melt 2 sticks butter. In a separate bowl combine remaining sugar and cinnamon. Dip baked muffins in butter, coating thoroughly, then coat with cinnamon-sugar mixture.

An Ode to Nonnie on Superbowl Sunday

Happy Superbowl Sunday! To my knowledge, my Nonnie never cared about football, or was ever really part of the football-watching culture in general, however, if she knew what kind of a food following these kinds of occasions provided -- she'd be all about it. We're hosting tonight, and for the occasion, I'm making meatballs. If you live near me, you've probably eaten one of these numbers at some point, and if not, I'm sorry. But you can make them yourself!

Check it out -- my cousin and I (mostly my cousin) published all of our Nonnie's handwritten recipes. We couldn't resist throwing a few of our own favorite recipes in the mix, and you can find them all in this wonderful volume:



For $20 (plus $5 shipping), you can bring Nonnie into your kitchen -- and trust me, there's NOTHING like Nonnie in the kitchen.

Here's the meatball recipe I'll be using today, just to whet your appetites:

Meatballs

You’ll need:
Equal parts beef, pork, and veal –totalling 2.5 lbs.
1 onion, grated
3 cloves of garlic, crushed
½ to 3/4 C. cup plain bread crumbs
2 T. tomato paste
1 T. dried oregano
½ C. chopped flat leaf Italian parsley
½ C. parmesan
1 egg

Sauce:
1 28 oz. can crushed San Marzano tomatoes
1 small can chopped San Marzano tomatoes
1 cup good red wine

Method:
Mix meat lightly, just until ingredients are combined – careful not to overmix. Make into balls the size of golf balls – and sautee in batches until browned. Transfer to a baking pan. Deglaze pan with wine, add tomatoes & salt to taste. Pour sauce over sautéed meatballs in baking dish, cover with parchment paper then tinfoil, and bake at 300 degrees for 2 hours (or more, if you're a glutton for punishment--your house will smell too amazing to wait to eat these). Enjoy on their own, with your favorite pasta, with garlic bread, or in a bun as a sandwich!

Salute!

the more things change...

The more they stay the same.



Yep, still watching the Food Network as much as time allows. And, still hating on Sandra Lee. She cooks like a B-rate caterer, and drinks like one too. There's really no need for her to be on TV. Yuck.

pulse?

That's the theme for 2010. I can't believe it's 2010. An apology if you've actually been trying to follow this blog - you know, clicking the link, hoping for something tasty, and disappointed to find the same "Vini, Vidi, Vace" post for months. Here's the thing - I moved 3 (yes, three) times in 2009. That's three times signing up on usps.com and changing my address. Three times changing all my billing information for every single account. Three times hauling my belongings all over the District of Columbia. And, in none of these places did I ever hook up the internet. So, I'm finally settled and I have a really lovely little kitchen to cook in, and I'm newly engaged, and I'm all kinds of happy to get on with my life. And my internet's getting installed on Friday.

Usually I like to do a review of the ups and downs of the past year...but, in the vein of starting things on a positive note, I'm going to give you a list of my 2009 highlights:

-Along with my really wonderful cousin and aunt, published a cookbook!
**visit www.nonnieskitchen.com if you're interested in ordering one.

-My best friend asked me to marry him

I'm still cooking - but less, as I don't have a dishwasher who isn't also my fiance. I moved near Eastern Market - my favorite is taking $10 to the market and finding out what I can make for dinner with it - there have been a lot of roasted chickens with sweet potatoes and parsnips. You can't beat it, really. Anyway, I'm back with my cookerings, can't wait to have the internets turned on in my apartment. As always, thanks for visiting the blog, and cheers to 2010.

vini, vidi, vace!

Vace Italian Deli
3315 Connecticutt Avenue
NW Washington DC 20008
(202) 363-1999
www.vaceitaliandeli.com

What's better than a couple good friends, a rainy day, a great movie, and a couple yum-azing pizzas? Almost nothing, that's what. Go, see, and eat some pizza from Vace!

Crust: Not thin, not thick. Strikes the perfect in-between balance.
Sauce: Slightly sweet, just like I like it.
Cheese: Ample, fresh, gooey.
Toppings you shouldn't miss: Pepperoni - sliced fresh from their deli.

Thanks, CC, for showing me some of the District's finest!

NPR's $10 Recipe Challenge

Forget Sandra Lee - NPR's got the money-saving, food-making game all wrapped up. Check out this awesome list of $10 recipes (including a decadent Mac-n-cheese by the Neelys, a skate dish from a former Navy Chef, and Jose Andres' family favorite stew):

How Long Can You Go? $10 Meals

Thanks, H, for sending this my way!

From a post I did a while ago, "Ten Meals for Ten Bucks," here's one of MY favorite $10 recipes!

LEMON PASTA

What to buy:

Barilla PLUS Thin Spaghetti, 1 lb. $1.75

1 5 oz. pkg. Stella Parmesan - $4.49

3 lemons - $3.00

Total: $9.24

What to do: Put a large pot of water on to boil, and add at least 2 T. salt into the water. Meanwhile, grate the entire block of parmesan, and juice the lemons, taking care to remove any seeds. While the pasta is cooking, whisk together the lemon juice, plus 1/4 C. olive oil, plus 1 t. salt and plenty of black pepper. When the pasta is al dente (about 9 mins), don't drain it - instead use a tongs to move the pasta from the boiling water to the bowl with the lemon juice/olive oil. When pasta has been combined with lemon juice and olive oil - add 1 C. pasta water into the bowl. Toss until absorbed (2 mins), then begin to incorporate about 1/2 the grated parmesan (you can use the other half of the parmesan to top each individual plate, if you like a lot of parmesan, which I do). Enjoy!

sunday at noon: more sandra lee

THANKS Food Network! Just what I have always wanted...MORE SANDRA LEE. I've been thinking for a long time: if only I knew of more ways to throw myself at my dinner guests while serving them near inedible food and toxic cocktails...

This Sunday at noon, the Food Network is debuting a second show hosted by Sandra Lee. This time, it's called "Sandra's Money Saving Meals." I'm all about saving money on food, so, under most circumstances I feel like I'd be all about watching this show.

As I have documented in the past, I really can't explain how much Sandra Lee bothers me. If you're new here (welcome!), this should help explain it: I just did a search for Sandra Lee on YouTube. The following "suggested searches" came up:

sandra lee drunk
sandra lee semi-homemade
sandra lee hot
sandra lee bikini
sandra lee cake
sandra lee beach
sandra lee cocktail

Le sigh. Anyway, I am curious to see what this new show is all about, and whether or not it will soften my harsh views on her or fan the flame...The only thing I think Sandra Lee likes is, well, more Sandra Lee.

pasta with brown butter & parmesan

I'm not doing my butt any favors with this one - but the simplicity and just plain YUM of this pasta are worth sharing, swimsuit season be damned. This is one of those recipes that I remember eating when I was knee high (with alphabet pasta and parmesan from a can)...except this version uses an upgrade on all the ingredients, and a simple twist on one ingredient. These small changes produce something that is at once complex and familiar, elegant but comforting. Enjoy...

Pasta with brown butter & parmesan
Prep time: 0
Cook time: 10 minutes
Serves: 2

You'll need:
8 oz fettucine or spaghetti (DeCecco fettucine in the nests is my favorite)
4 T. good quality creamery butter
1/4 C. parmesan, fresh grated

Here's how:
First, put a pot of water on to boil. Once the water is at a rolling boil, add 2 T. salt. Boil pasta according to package directions (if using fresh pasta, this will only take 2-3 minutes, dried will take longer).

Next, in a skillet over low heat, melt the butter. Let the butter foam. Swirl it around once or twice, then put the butter back on, and let the butter foam again - this time the foam should be golden yellow (will take about 6-7 minutes for the butter to go from solid to golden)... When you see this foam, remove the pan from the heat - you should be able to smell it now. If you burn or over-cook the butter, discard it and start over.

When the pasta is ready, use a pair of tongs to transfer the pasta from the boiling water to the pan with the brown butter in it. Toss lightly. Place in serving bowls, and top with a few T. fresh grated parmesan.

Simple, simple, simple, mmmmmm...

fat kid treats

Midnight Snacks with Vanessa: Round 4,432,589,932.

Vanessa and I lived together in Rome. We caused a ruckus, regularly. She came to town and her flight got canceled, we did what we do best. Here's just one of the many fat kid treats we could've created.

Supplies: Whole wheat honey flavored English Muffins, chocolate chips, chunky peanut butter. Major bonus points if your chocolate chips are celebrating their 3rd anniversary and you found the English Muffins in the bottom of your refrigerator. Step 1: Use a fork to split open the English muffins. Put them on a sheet pan. Butter them (preferably with butter that comes out of a tub, a huge tub), and bake them for 10 minutes.

Next, peanut butter [jelly!] time! Spread peanut butter on top of toasted buttery English muffin halves. Peanut butter is HILARIOUS.

Oh, and find a banana that has approximately 1 more day in its life before it looks like a fossil. Slice it up. Put it on top of the peanut butter and English muffin.

Sprinkle your finest aged chocolate chunks over the bananas...


Yeah, keep going.


The room should look like this. If it doesn't: midnight snax, ur doing it rong.


Put the English muffins and the banana and the chocolate back in the oven for a few minutes until the chocolate looks shiny. That means it's melty. Mmm...melty. Oooh, and sprinkle some cinnamon over the top of it. Because cinnamon is delicious.



Eat. Share. Watch out for rogue Kardashians, overly friendly squirrels, and lastly, I definitely don't recommend any strenuous activity such as Dance Dance Revolution.

These are seriously delicious. We need your help. What should we call them?
1) Fat Kid Treats
2) Chunky & Mullet's Midnight Moonpie
3) ___________ [write your own]

Leave your suggestions & email address in the comments...winner gets a prize.